Weakness = Strength

July 13, 2025

I have always been an advocate for personal growth and one of my core beliefs is that most people are capable of change. I carry hope with me like a crown, ready to bestow it on anyone that crosses my path. I have hope that people will make changes for their good and hope that I will also grow toward becoming the best version of myself. Hope is a beautiful thing. Hope allows me to encourage my girls when they need it. And hope gives me the perspective to do my work as a coach in a way that empowers my clients to change what they may not believe is possible.

For most of us, change is just part of our journey. Life changes and we adapt. We set goals and we work toward them. Sure, there are uncomfortable moments because evolving is hard and it doesn’t happen overnight. Growth is the process of continuing to move toward living a life aligned with who we were meant to be. 

I’m learning that hope is a strength but also a weakness. Not every situation is hopeful. Not everyone changes and especially not on my timeline. There are people who are set in their ways, stubborn people, people who hold tightly to their fixed beliefs, people who are stuck in unhealthy patterns.  Even worse are people who appear to have a growth mindset but with no real evidence of change in their lives. It’s just lies and pretense. Before I knew better I have mistakenly given these people my hope when they haven’t deserved it. Other times I fought a little too hard for situations that were not in my power to change.

I'm often haunted by my dashed hopes. You see I also carry them with me, not as a strength, my crown of hope, but as my weakness, my crown of shame.  Maybe it’s because I still believe when I know I shouldn’t or because there was never resolution or closure. But I’m learning to visit these ghosts less and less, to accept their existence, accept the mistakes I made and that some things may never be resolved. Some ghosts are easier to let go of than others and that’s OK. I fashioned myself a new crown of hope that comes with a healthy acceptance of reality. 

Hope is less about achieving perfection and more about having faith in possibilities. So I’m here to tell you, friends, that your weaknesses are also your strengths. The situations that break your heart provide insight into a strength you maybe never knew you had. You see them as weaknesses but the truth is that they are gifts that provide the opportunities to step into a version of yourself who can use your gifts to help others. You just need to have a little hope in what is possible. You can borrow some of my hope if you need it.  I know it’s not easy or quick and may feel impossible but I believe that you, yes you, can transform your crown of shame into a crown of hope of your very own.